Talking to people at work, on ZOOM or in-person can feel like tiptoeing through a minefield now. Even Mike White can’t resist holding up a mirror to how hard it is to avoid confrontation - among "best friends" in season 3 of White Lotus. If engagement between people with decades of history together is being presented this way, imagine how loaded it can be with people you’ve just been put on a work team with!
Engagement Really is King
Nevertheless, according to a recent study, organizations with the highest levels of employee engagement were 22% more profitable and 21% more productive than organizations with low engagement. This doesn’t only apply to work. Think of your marriage, your parents and the highest degree of communication difficulty - your teenager. Every therapist everywhere will tell you that staying engaged with each other is the key to maintaining connection, working together and most importantly working through challenges. Toward that end, here are five ways to nurture engagement even when it feels treacherous.
5 Employee Engagement Ideas That Work!
- Stay Curious.Talk less, smile more. Thank you Lin-Manuel Miranda. Sure Hamilton is a musical, but seriously folks, asking questions and being quiet for the answer is the key to maintaining engagement.
- Know Your Audience - this is right from the stand up comedy playbook. I spent two weeks on it for my UCLA course. Adhering to number one above definitely helps, but going the extra mile for some backstory on who the people you are working/living with goes a long way to skipping over minefields. Fortunately, a little Googling, or checking Instagram can give you lots of information about people.
- Express Appreciation - you don’t have to agree with someone on their opinions to compliment something you like about them. Or their shoes, the way they talk about their pets or their passion for The Great British Bake Off. When we lead with admiration, it’s amazing what we get back.
- Don’t give up. Not everyone dazzles with scintillating conversation, but that’s not a reason to stop engaging. We must keep trying.
Keep it light and polite. I’m not sure who said this first, but no truer words have been spoken for engagement. I’ll admit, this one is hardest with immediate family whose ideas are simply all wrong! I’m kidding, of course. However, this simple boundary for productive conversation is another great tool for making sure we stay connected to each other. People love insult humor, thank you Don Rickles. It can be very entertaining in that “Oh no he didn’t!” way. But for making sure we’re engaging with each other during contentious times, save it for the clubs and let’s please make an effort to talk to each other with respect!
